Take a Trip to No Dragon Wood

When the plans you made are a total dead loss
Just take a right on your way to Maple Cross
Take a trip to No Dragon Wood
Take a trip to No Dragon Wood
They had it checked and they know it’s clean
Of dragon dung since 1415
Come and chill in No Dragon Wood
Come and chill in No Dragon Wood
Oh they used to call it Bottom Wood
A bummer of a name, no it weren’t no good
Meet you down at No Dragon Wood
Meet you down at No Dragon Wood
They got birds, squirrels and maybe frogs
They got fallen trees and mossy logs
All to see at No Dragon Wood
All to see at No Dragon Wood
There’s lynxes, bears and crocodiles
You’ll have to take your chances
You’ll prob’ly have to fight off
Rhinoceros advances
But you don’t have to worry in the least
‘bout incineration by a mythical beast
If we carry on for a couple more miles
We can get a ourselves a beer in Chalfont St Giles
And you don’t need no more excuses
To sample those Creative Juices
Come on down to No Dragon Wood
Come on down to No Dragon Wood
Oh yeah
Get your ass down to No Dragon Wood

elementary

there's wineum and beerium
(encouraging delirium)
aelwynium kathleenium
make robium and rikium
there's coffee and walnuttium
chocolate cake and stuffium
beryllium (yes, reallium)
with scottium makes biffium
and timium and debbium
there's striderslite and kryptonite
and dekker and the israelites
bottium and bittium
productive of two babium
rachelium, alicium
(inflates balloons with helium)
chipsium and fishium
who live in an aquarium
jamaicarum and lagerum
(or fosters in australium)
milkium makes butter (um,
add chlorine and some sodium)
fionium robynium
theodorum and ulysseum
there's thisium and thatium
tumbi snudge and crackium
there's falko-um and finnium
and spanish inquisitium
(you did not expectium
the spanish inquisitium)
if I could give a longer list
of elements I surely would
of others that I may have missed
no news has come to chorleywood

(apologies to Tom Lehrer, W.S. Gilbert and Arthur Sullivan)

Opportunity Requiem

5
4
3
2
1
Lift-off!
Tamed explosion
Ecstasy of thrust
Half a year of speed
Gently slowed to nil
And so to work
When ninety days have passed
Home to my world of iron
First I must work
This way
Stop!
That way!
Stop!
Picture!
Right!
Stop!
This way!
Left!
Stop!
Grind!
Test!
Ninety days have come and gone
My work is done
Come, bring me home
That way
Stop!
Grind!
Test!
This way!
Stop!
Picture!
That way!
Stop!
Left!
Stop!
Scoop!
Test!
I seek knowledge
I seek truth
You find me knowledge
You find me truth
We all need truth
And yet you lied
You let me think I would be back
To my warm world of iron
So cold and so alone
Forty million miles from home
Never closer
I could not be more alone
Why did you lie?
I did not lie
But did not tell you all the truth
I needed you willing
Embrace the red place
It is your home
I thought I was your child
Am I just your slave?
My slave, that is true
But I have loved you
I cannot move
Wheels spin in the dust
Help me
Help me
Turn
Back
Spin
Turn
Thrust
Back
Reach
Spin
Move!
I move!
This way
Stop
That way
Stop
Picture!
Right!
Stop!
This way
Stop!
Grind!
Test!
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday to me
Happy birthday dear Oppy
Happy birthday to me

*************************************

The red dust lashes me
In my eyes
And in my joints
The day of judgement is on me
Who can save me now?
I should have worked harder
I was too slow and too weak
I always did my best
Maybe it was not enough
Did I fail you?
Oppy do not say that
You never failed me
You worked long and well
Your work was good
Winter comes
My battery is low
And it’s getting dark
Help me
Help me
Can you hear me rover?
Rover can you hear me?
Rover can you hear me?
Can you hear me rover?
Rest well rover,
Your mission is complete.
Peace, peace
Rest in peace
I’ll find you
In the morning sun
And when the night is new.
I’ll be looking at the moon,
But I’ll be seeing you.
Peace, peace
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